I have a heavy heart to even start writing this post. It’s something that I have been putting off because I don’t want to write it. Writing it somehow makes it more real.
The past week and a half has been the hardest time in my life. As many of you heard and read here, I had been sick near the end of October. I was getting better, was getting my voice back, and was planning on coming back to work a week and a half ago on Monday morning.
On Saturday November 3, I got a phone call from my Dad that changed my life forever. My mom had passed away suddenly and un-expectantly in her sleep. She was only 61 years old and had some health problems, but nothing that made anyone think we would lose her anytime soon. I had spent time with her just a few weeks before and she had more energy than I did on our big shopping trip. I had no reason to ever believe it would be the last time I would ever see her.
I rushed back home to Orlando as quickly as possible to be with my Dad and brother. We spent the week making some extremely hard decisions and plans about her funeral and burial. We eventually found out that Mom died from an undiagnosed heart disease called ACD. She hated to go to the doctor and had not been in some time. However, I read online that ACD can be easily missed by doctors. So we will never know that if she had been to the doctor more frequently, if he/she would have been able to treat her heart.
My mom was my best friend and I’m not completely sure how life goes on without her. My comfort is knowing that she is in heaven now and she may not physically be here, but her spirit and love will always surround me.
My Mom had an amazing life and accomplished many things. If you’d like to learn more about her, I wrote about her life on the website link below:
Somehow through the grace of God, I found the strength to write and give the eulogy at her funeral Monday. It was the hardest thing I have ever done, but it was important to me to give it. I wanted to share it with you…. It’s posted below.
Thank you all for the love and support.
-----------------------------------
Mom loved beautiful sunny days (she would call it-- chamber of commerce weather), the south (especially Gone with the Wind), books (She would pick them out by the inches they were thick), chocolate raspberry truffles, visiting quaint small towns, long-haired dachshunds, jewelry shaped in a heart, and shopping. But most of all, she loved her family. To thousands of students she was an amazing Guidance Counselor who helped shape their lives… but to Dad, Tommy and me-- Mom was everything. She is the reason we are who we are today.
My mom was my closest friend, my biggest fan, my strongest advocate and my guiding light.
Mom taught me to be proud to be a southerner… especially when it comes to good food. I’d like to think that many of us now can hear her sweet accent telling us how much she loved green beans, corn bread, pinto beans and fried okra. She showed me how to make these things more than a dozen times, but my version was always missing something.
From my earliest memories, Mom devoted her life to taking care of my brother and I. I never remember a time when she wasn’t walking right beside us making sure we were happy. She guarded us from many things in life-- I used to complain that she was so strict and overprotective, but as I got older I realized that she was just trying to protect us and allow us to be young as long as possible. In today’s crazy, rough world there is something magical about that. In fact, according to her rules, I still don’t think she ever actually gave me permission to watch “R” rated movies.
When I was young, I felt like a mini version of my Mom. You may have noticed my Mom never left the house without looking put together-- with matched and coordinated outfits. She would dress me down to the matching shoes and bows in my hair as well. I remember walking around the halls of St. Luke’s and people calling me Amy because I looked so much like her. I was so proud to be just like my beautiful mom.
In high school, Mom and I drove to and from school together everyday. Since she worked at the same school I attended we were always together… and often running late. But even if we were behind, my mom would send me back inside the house if I wasn’t properly accessorized or dressed. She taught me that it’s always better to be overdressed than underdressed.
As I grew older, my mom became my best friend. She taught me to never pay full price and to always stop at the outlets malls along the interstate. We spent countless hours window shopping and hanging out. Our time together was more than just superficial time at the mall, it was our way to sort out life’s problems. We never ran out of things to talk about. And in between all those important conversations mom taught me about the finer names in life; Dooney, Coach, & Tanzanite.
Even today, I get e-mails from people, who see me on the news, asking me where I got my outfits. I can almost always say my mom helped pick them out for me.
Mom was the kind of parent who not just allowed you to dream big, but she would help you figure out how to make those dreams happen. When I insisted that I wanted to go to college to be a TV journalist, my mom researched every college in the country to find the best schools with TV programs. We spent countless days on the road, even at one point driving all the way up to the Carolinas, visiting all of the colleges she had found. We were two girls on a mission, to find a college with a TV program and to stop at all the good malls along the way. We had the best time. After looking at dozens of colleges, we decided neither of us wanted to be that far away from each other so I went to the College of Journalism and Communications at the University of Florida- which was actually one of the best programs. It really worked out because my mom and I got to stay close… AND she promised to do all my laundry. For four years I came home every couple of weekends with bags of laundry on Friday and she would send me back to school with clean clothes and often a new pair of shoes or shirt on Sunday.
As I started my career and had to move farther away from her for work, I knew mom was always just a phone call away. We talked almost every day. On many occasions she drove hours through the night to be with me if I was feeling blue or homesick. She would do anything for me. Mom never missed a chance to tell me that she “loved me more than life itself.”
Mom spent her life trying to pass along her best qualities to her family…. to be humble, independent and kind. She was a southern belle with a one-of-a-kind style, grace, and beauty. She set high standards to live her life by and expected us to aim high as well. Occasionally we fell short, but we never doubted her love and devotion.
Mom-- you will always be my guiding light, my northern star, and my moral compass. We are all so lucky to have been touched by your gentle unconditional love.
Mary Thirtyacre says
Julie,
What a wonderfully written tribute to the love you and your Mom shared. It brought tears to my eyes because unfortualtely my Mom and I were never very close as I got older due to some mental problems including early onset dementia. I miss my younger days when she and I shared so much. I miss her now too, as she passed away 5 years ago at age 83. You lost your Mom way too soon. Bless you!
JulieWunder says
Bless you too Mary. I know we will both be missing our Mom's this weekend.
Thank you for reading my post. It has helped me to know so many people have got to read about what an amazing women she was.
Joyce M. Ogles says
oh ms. Julie....I too have lost my mom...going on 13 years...and my dad just alittle over a yr ago.....May God give you the strength and the wisdom to know that your mom is in HIS care and remind you that she is always and forever with you...she is in better shape today than yester years......she is still pulling for you....and smiles at you on a daily basis....I know she is so proud...
JulieWunder says
Thank you Joyce. She is watching from heaven-- I am sure of that.
Wendy says
Julie, there are no words to express the sorrow over the loss of those we love. I pray God will hold you and your family safely in his arms and give you comfort and peace to get through the toughest of times. Your Mom will live on forever in your heart.
JulieWunder says
Thank you all from the bottom of my heart for so much support and so many kind comments. I am so grateful for all you reaching out and keeping my family in your thought and prayers during this difficult time. Thank you for letting me share my story with you. Love you all, Julie
Danne says
I am so sorry for your loss. What a beautiful tribute to your mother! When I see you on the news It willl be a reminder to say a prayer for you.
Liliane Strawser says
I am so sorry about your loss. Thank you for sharing your mom with us. I have lost mine many years ago and still miss her. I am praying for you and your family and am praying that one day the memories of your mom will warm your heart and make you smile again.
Linda Stiles says
Julie so sorry for the loss of your mom, I lost mine 8 yrs.ago and miss her daily. That was a beautiful tribute to her and I know she was smiling as you read it and saying " that's my girl, the wonderful journalist, she is" . Will continue prayers for peace and contentment in the days ahead. We love you!
Mary says
Julie, I am so sorry to hear about your dear mother. I understand because I lost my mom, who was my best friend, back in 2005. I'm praying for God to comfort you and your family and to take it one day at a time.
Rebecca G. McDaris says
Julie, my prayers and love are with you. The way your words express the love and admiration for your Mom touch my heart. My Mom passed away in 1999, and not one day has passed that I don't think of her and even verbally say aloud, "I love you, Mother, and I miss you so much!"
mckee Cox says
I don't think there are words that will ever make things easier for you, and I know what you mean when you say you don't see how life can go on without her. My mama is my best friend too, and she is a few yrs older than your sweet mama was, and I thank God for every day I get with her, because you never know. I wish I could make you feel better some how, but only God and time can do that. I hope you have lots of comforting, loving people around you to lift you up, I will keep you in my prayers.
Susan Kosma says
Julie, thank you for the lovely celebration of your Mother's life. She will be a role model for us all. She grew you into a bright, kind, attentive woman whom we all admire and love. My heart goes out to you.
Greg Watson says
Julie
I Wish I Had Some Words That Would Make It All Better....But At Times Like These.....TheyJust Don't Seem To Be Any.
I Can Just Only Pray That God Will Give You,Your Father And Brother The Strength You Will Need To Get Through This Tme And The Time Ahead. God Bless And Keep You All.
Julia says
I'm so sorry for your loss! What a beautiful tribute to your mom...the two of you were so lucky to have each other.
Julia
Amy Horne says
Love you Julie! So sorry for your loss. You and your entire family are in my thoughts and prayers.
Norma McNeely says
I sure did miss you on the news. I was very sorry to hear about your loss. I know she will forever be in your heart. Your mother was very proud of you I know,because I am proud of you and I don't even know you personally. Stay strong and I will be praying for you.
Glad to see you back on the news.
Norma McNeely
Melissa Dalton says
I am so sorry for your loss, I can't even imagine. My mom is 85 and I still have her here. My thoughts will be with you and your family.
Patricia says
Julie,sorry to hear of your Mother's passing. The good part is she is with her Savior.Some day you will be united with her for ever. But for now my prayers are with you and your family. May God hold you all close and fill that empty place in your heart with His love. Keep your memories of your Mother alive and talk about her all the time. This will help, someday you may have children and you can be as good to your children as your Mother was to you.
jim ackley says
I am so sorry for your loss.
Lisa Frohock says
As hard as it was for you to write this I am thankful that you did. You have helped many others that are grieving. You also pointed out that material things don't matter except for the proper accessories. Your mother left you with a great legacy, how to be true to yourself and still be a lady. You have a lot of class. I know your mother couldn't be any more proud. Welcome back. We missed you.
jean edwards says
julie, losing a loved one is something you never get over, but you do get past it.treaure those great memories! i lost my mom suddenly, too - in a car crash when she was only 41. i was 18 and in college at the time, lean on your family and friends now...they will get you through. love and hugs to you in this tough time!
Jim says
We are so sorry for your loss Julie. There are no words to sooth your sorrow. Just know that there are many people praying for you and your family and that your mother will always be with you in spirit.
martha says
Julie, so sorry to hear of the sudden loss of your mother. There will not be a day go by that you won't have a thought or a memory of your mother. Cherish every moment you ever had and just remember you will always have your mother with you on your heart.
lori says
proud of you, telling me she was here visiting...Your were LOVED and still are...God be with you!!
lori says
Julie..I am so very sorry for the "Earthly" loss of your mother..I met her, once, as she came into Pier One..asking to look at the "Plastic" placemats her Daughter has, they were really leather...She was so very sweet and I remember showing her the way over to look at what she thought to be the very same one's you had, you joined her and I so remember her SO proud of you, telling me she was here visiting...Your were LOVED and still are...God be with you!!
Jeff Wells says
Julie, the GATOR Nation stands beside you & your Family & sends their condolences. I enjoy your Weathercast & especially your specials with the pets. Praying for God's peace for you & your Family. One day I'll look your Mom up when I get to Heaven & we'll swap stories of our kids.
Tracy Long says
Julie,
So sorry about your mom. I know that losing a parent can be devastating. I lost my dad 18 years ago. He was 61. After daddy died, I started writing. Back then, Facebook and blogs didn't exist, so I bought a journal. I wrote down everything I felt. I wrote to him, and I wrote how I felt. The writing was very therapeutic. I encourage you to keep writing... It will keep her memory alive, and help you begin to heal. God bless you and your family!
April says
I watch the morning news with my daughters ages 11 & 6 and they have asked soooo many times where you are. They miss you which I think is so sweet and says a lot about you!!! So very sorry to hear all you've been going thru especially the loss of your mom. You're in our prayers. Looking foward to your return.
Corinne Yelton says
Julie, my heart goes out to you in your time of grief. I pray that God's peace goes with you every minute of every day, and that you will come to feel the comfort that only He can give. I'll be praying for you and look forward to when you can be back in our living rooms doing the weather. I hope, however, that you will take your time working through the grief process and don't push coming back too soon.
Janet says
Julie, i understand how it feels to loose your best friend. I lost my mom Dec.29,2009 after he being so sick for so long. I know in my heart she is in Heaven watching over me and my family. It is so hard to go on without her in my life. But with the grace of GOD and the love and support of my family and friends and church family I have gotten thru it. Take it one day at a time.
mel says
Your story touched my heart...lost my mom 5 years again still have days I cry.......cherish the memories because yours are wonderful.....She raised a wonderful daughter to carry on her southern charm......in my prayers.....
Rhonda Guffey says
What a wonderful tribute to your mother. Thank you for sharing. It was an honor to be able to share in your memories.
Shirley says
Julie, we are so sorry for the loss of your Mother.. Our prayers are with you and your family. My Mother passed away at age 61, with heart disease that we didn't know about. This story made me want to start crying.. May God bless you each day..
gary brown says
praying for GODS grace and peace to fill you during this time
Elizabeth Thomas says
I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your mother. There is nothing that can replace the closeness and love of a mother. My mother was my best friend and I lived with her. She died on 11-10-11, and these two years have been so hard. I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers. Thank you for sharing the eulogy with us. It is beautiful, and could have been said about my mother, too.
Peg Dixon says
So very, very sorry for your loss Julie. I can only imagine how heartbroken you are. It is very difficult to lose a parent. I hope you find the comfort you need to get through this more than difficult time.
gary brown says
this is so precious and inspirational may GOD feel you with HIS grace and pace during this time
cheryl ritchey says
Heaven has a special angel now Your Mom always remeber the special things, God bless you, you are in my thoughts and prayers
Tony Cabe says
So Sorry to hear About Your Mom, Praying for You & your Family May God Bless!
gary brown says
this is so precious such an inspiration may GOD fill you with HIS grace and peace during this time
June Tucker says
So sorry for your loss Julie. I had no idea this had happened. I also lost my mother 4 years ago on my birthday. Like you, my mother also died unexpectantly. Losing your mother, is never easy. Time does make it easier, but there will always be a hol3 in your heart. May God wrap His arms around you and provide y8u and your family with comfort and solice during your time of bereavement. God bless each of you.
rita wright jones says
so sorry. i lost my momma in 2006. nothing like your momma.
Molly Irani says
Meherwan and I send you prayers and strength and armfulls of love in this very hard time. May you be surrounded by love and comfort,
Molly and Meherwan Irani
Judy Jones says
Julie,I cried as I read your story of you and your mother.
I am so sorry you lost your best friend yet it makes me envy the relationship you had with her. I was never that lucky my whole life I wanted a life like you had with your mom. I am glad you got to have that life.
She will always be in your heart and just a whisper away
You will see her in the stars and in the clouds
I pray God will give you the peace you need.
I can see the real Julie now and you are beautiful inside and out.
GOD BLESS You
james cannon says
Julie, I lost my mother in January of 2011. I am so sorry to hear of your loss. I will be praying for you.
Terri Burnette says
Julie....I buried my mom last wednesday. She also lived in Florida, and I also received that phonecall. I did get to spend one precious week with her before she went home, but we still did not expect it to be that soon. No one really knows how I feel, even though they think that they do, because they have lost their mothers as well. But no one else had a mother like mine, and I think that you must feel the same way. I do not know how I will live without her. She was ALWAYS here for me whenever I had surgery, or anything else I needed her for. The first Christmas without here is going to be so hard. But her first Christmas in Heaven will be so sweet for her. God bless you, Julie. I will be thinking about you and praying for you, and please do the same for me. Thank you for your blog. I feel that I am not alone.
Timothy Thew says
Julie, Sorry for your loss. I just lost two brothers in the past year and a half. Just know that our thoughts and prayers are with you.
Pamela McCall says
I am so sorry to hear of your loss Julie. Thanks for sharing your memories of what was truly a special lady. I lost my sweet Dad when he was only 55. He didn't get to walk me down the aisle or meet my hubby but he instilled in me so many things that I am grateful for to this day. I love my mom and have a wonderful relationship with her as well and I am so thankful you had such a wonderful relationship with your mother. Your mother was truly a blessing to you and your family. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayes.
Cynthia says
Julie, I am so sorry. You have been in my prayers and you will continue to be in them. We love you and wish you comfort during these tough days.
CONNIEBRADLEY says
JULIE, I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL. MY DAD HAD A MASSIVE HEART ATTACK. MY HEART GOES OUT TO YOU, TIIME WILL HELP EASE THE PAIN.BUT, AT LEAST YOU HAVE ALL THE MEMORIES OF YOU AND YOUR MOM. TREASURE THEM. NOONE CAN TAKE THEM AWAY FROM YOU. OUR THOUGHTS AND PRAYERS ARE WITH YOU.
Cheryl Ann @ The Sweet Little Things says
So sorry, Julie. I understand loss, my younger sister died suddenly and then my son was killed in a car accident. Both were sudden and that is always hard. I'm proud of you for speaking at her funeral and I'm sure she is too!
Pat Cagle says
Julie,
My the comfort of God and His holy spirit keep you and your family in His loving arms. I have been in your shoes, and losing your mom is one of the hardest things you ever go through in life. She raised one really great daughter, and her legacy will live on through you!
You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers.
Madeline St Onge says
You have totally broken my heart Julie, it is always so hard to loose a mom but like this so sudden it has to be devastating, wrapping you in my arms and holding you in my heart Sweetie, I am so sorry for your loss
Madeline St Onge says
And you looks so like your mom
Dru Williamson says
Julie, I was so sorry to hear that you lost your mom. Your family will be in my prayers. You commented about never being able to fix her food to taste like hers. The reason is is that the food always had a magic touch of mama love in it.
Judy says
Julie, I am so sorry. My Mom is still here, but she is lost in a way to a disease called FTD. She doesn't communicate very much anymore and is unable to do the things she did before. She was a wonderful gardener and we traveled together, but that can't be now. Every one is blessed that has a family member that has truly been a positive part of their life. So hard, when that ends. You and your family are in my prayers.
Carolyn Mull says
My heart aches for you. I lost my mom when I was 25. She was my best friend also. Grief will be hard for along time. Sad to say nothing will ever be the same again. Just hold to the promise of seeing her again and be there for your dad. He will need you. God be with you thru it all.
Nikki says
I am so sorry to hear about your mom and I will be praying for you and your family in this difficult and life changing time in your life. Thoughts and prayers with you.
Sherry Darby says
so sorry for your loss, sending prayers for you and your family.
Becky Morgan says
Julie, I am so truly sorry to see you lost your precious mother. I understand that loss, as I too lost mine when she was only 41. Treasure her memory, keep one thing that she loved close. I will be praying that grace and comfort continues to carry you and your family through the coming days.
Gerri says
julie!I am turly sorry about your mom...there is never enough words to say how deeply sorry I am but please know I am here if you ever need anything, I truly understand because I have lost both of my parents...it does get easier but until then please know I am here if you ever need someone to talk to
Martha Ward says
I don't have any words of comfort for you as I lost my Mother 16 years ago and I know the pain you are going through. One thing you said in your blog made me smile as my daughter and myself had a related conversation on about an hour earlier. We were talking about how people dress to go out in public and she said "You could always wear you pajamas and bedroom shoes." I informed her that I always had myself together before I went out in public. She replied, "I am so glad that you taught me that." My mother taught me that and I passed it along to my daughters. Cherish your mother's memory always. God bless you.
Ellen Britt says
Julie, thank you so much for sharing this. Your love of your beautiful mother shines through in every word! As a native Southerner (with a Southern mama who is now 90 years old) I can so appreciate the qualities in your mom you admired so much. You and your family are in my prayers for God's comfort. May your faith stay strong in the promise of being reunited with her on some bright 'chamber of commerce' weather day!
Mary says
I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my Mother 4 yrs ago, and I miss her every day. Praying for you and your family.
God Bless!
cheryl says
so sorry for your loss i know how you feel i lost my dad suddenly ten years ago he was only 47 he had heart problems too and then 4 years late i lost my mom she died of cancer i know its hard now and you will miss her terribly as time goes on things do get easier may God Comfort you and your family in this time
Cindy Hedgcoth says
Julie,
My heart breaks for you and your family, please take comfort in knowing you have angles above to watch over you.
Your in our thoughts and prayers, Cindy and Scott Hedgcoth
John Payne says
Julie
I am deeply sorry and sadden to hear about your Mothers passing. There are no words that could ever express to you of all of our saddness. We Pray that God will comfort you during this most difficult time and we lift you up in our prayers.
Robin says
Im praying for you guys my dad died August 6th 2011 i miss him so much. I think about him everyday i pray GOD touch you with peace and love.
John Haldane says
Geez, I didn't know your mom and only know you through Facebook, but I cried when I read your loving tribute to her. Bless you, Julie. May you find comfort in the love of friends and family and joy in the memories of your mom.
robby hess says
Julie
I am so sorry for your loss . I completely understand being that close to a parent and them being the rock and friend. You and your family will be in my prayers during this difficult time.
Ron Frankl says
So sorry for your loss, Julie. My thoughts and prayers go to you and your family at this difficult time.
Jean Maurie says
So so sorry Julie. We send you our thoughts and love
Janet Filkins says
Julie, we are so sorry for the loss of your mother. You and your family are in our prayers!
Sommer@ASpicyPerspective says
Julie, I can't even imagine how you must feel. My mom means the world to me and it's easy to pretend that things will always go on just how they are.
I'm so sorry for your loss. We will continue to pray for your family and broken hearts.