I hope you guys don't mind me taking a moment to just break the blogging mold today and just speak a little from the heart. Life has felt very heavy recently and I decided it just didn't feel right post today's scheduled workout. (Although it's an awesome workout, and I've bumped it to publish soon.)
My former co-anchor, Jay Siltzer lost his 8-year-old son Malachi last week. The services were yesterday.
Malachi died from complications to brain cancer. No one should have to bury a son, but can you even fathom doing that after you've lost both your wife (leukemia) and your father in just a few short years. On top of that, Jay is a cancer survivor himself. It's more struggle than any one person should have to endure.
If you've been following the blog for a long time, you may remember me writing about his wife Kelly's fight with cancer.
Sitting next to someone on a TV news anchor desk gives you a special perspective on their life. For eight years I spent more time with him than my own family.
I had a front row seat when he and Kelly first met and adopted Malachi from Ethiopia. I watched helplessly as his wife bravely fought cancer and cried along with Jay when she lost it. As Jay and Malachi bounced back from the loss, I laughed until I cried hearing about funny Malachi stories. Like his father he was quite the sarcastic comedian and had a way with words. Hearing about Malachi's antics was often the highlight of an entire morning at work.
While it's been hard to maintain that closeness since I left the TV station, I'm still blessed to call Jay a friend and my heart still aches for his loss. I have been truly impressed by his profound faith during this terrible time.
Malachi was a vivacious, special little boy who was so full of life and faith. He was smart, witty and brought joy into a room just by being there. It's hard to understand or comprehend why stuff like this happens, but you just have to pray for peace and comfort. God has a plan, and we just have to have faith. If you are the praying type, please add Jay to your list today.
This Too Shall Pass....
I'm not telling you this story to bring down your day, but hopefully to bring some perspective to it and use this chance to share some wise words that help me in hard times. I know first hand how we all are hit with periods of our life that seem overwhelming and hard. The truth is bad stuff happens to all of us. Sometimes that bad stuff is unthinkable, like what has happened to Jay.
Whenever I'm going through a hard time my Dad says in his wise, all knowing voice (the same one that taught me how to change a tire and balance a checkbook)... This Too Shall Pass. I honestly used to get so mad at him for saying that because I felt like he was trivializing my current struggle (sorry, Dad!) I've always been one to wear my heart on my sleeve and feel my emotions to the fullest.
The older I get the more I understand and appreciate what he means. It seems like there's not a phase of our life... whether it be really good or really bad.... that actually lasts. It's events like losing a loved one that remind us to live each day to the fullest because good or bad, what you are feeling right now will not last forever. My Dad even said This Too Shall Pass... after my Mom died. He knew the worst of the pain we were feeling would fade over time. And while I miss her every day it stings a lot less than it once did.
I know many of you may be struggling today with all sorts of problems. No matter how large or small your problems may be, hold on and honor the struggle knowing it can't last forever. Our attitude and faith during these moments can make or break you. Like Jay, trusting in God's plan is something that can carry you through dark or even gray days.
When the good days roll back around live them to the fullest because they can be fleeting as well.
Life is full of ebs and flows and has a certain undeniable serendipity. There is a dashing glimmer of relief that comes with coming to terms with that. So as my Dad would say... This Too Shall Pass...
Thanks for listening to a bit of ramble today guys. Back to regularly schedule blog love tomorrow including a clean eating healthy cookie recipe with no flour or sugar. I hope to see you then.
I'm linking up with Thinking Out Loud Thursday.
Your turn!
No questions today... just reflections on a good or bad time in your life.
Kimmythevegan says
Oh my goodness. You have written this beautifully. I had a hard time reading it to be honest as I've had cancer myself and lost my dad to cancer and it was just so rough. I honestly can't fathom what Jay is going through right now, but knowing he has loving and supportive people in his life must help tremendously.
I will try your mantra when I have something big going on that I can't imagine getting through a rough time. Although losing my dad was absolutely the hardest thing I have ever had to do, it does get easier with time.
*hugs* thank you for sharing this.
JulieWunder says
I didn't know you had cancer too. And your Dad? Wow. It seems so prevalent these days. I lost my Mom 4 years ago in November. It's terrible.
Lot's of love your way! I hope my Dad's advice helps.
Kim @GetGreenBeWell says
I had no idea Jay was going through that. I used to watch him all the time when we lived there. It is a testament to the fact to live life to the fullest each and every day. I needed to hear that. Sometimes you lose perspective. Grateful for happiness and healing today 🙂
JulieWunder says
Thanks so much for the support Kim.
Lauren says
Julie--what a special tribute to such a sweet boy! I am sure God has a bigger plan but sometimes it gets tough to really rationalize what that plan is when such awful things happen to such amazing people! Sending so much love and healing energy, xo!
JulieWunder says
I'm sure he does. We just have to trust and have faith in that plan. Thanks for reading today.
rachel @ athletic avocado says
Oh I'm so sorry Julie. My prayers go out to you and your family and friends. you are most definitely right, this too shall pass 🙂
JulieWunder says
Thanks so much Rachel!
Morgan @ Morgan Manages Mommyhood says
Oh, my heart is hurting! This si such a heartbreaking story - as a mom, my BIGGEST fear is something happening to my boys. it just doesn't seem fair for this man to ahve gone through so, so much
My dad used to say the same. this too shall pass thing, and like you, I felt like he wasn't taking my problems seriously. But you're right - as you get older, you realize that life does in fact go on.
My prayers go out to your friend and his family.
JulieWunder says
I know. It's so scary. Seems like our Dad's should be friends- haha!
Libby Haire says
Dear Julie,
We lost my uncle, mom's brother, in August. He was the last of her brothers, leaving mom and her sister still here. We know that each of them is in a far better place now. However that does not help the ache immediately but it does allow us to appreciate "this, too, shall pass" when we consider how our Lord sent The Comforter to help us.
We have watched Jay, and the WLOS staff over the past decade or so, and come to care about each of them. This story is heartbreaking, but I am so glad you posted it today. Thank you for sharing and keeping us, your readers, a part of your extended family. Know, and share if you will, that Jay has our thoughts with him during these most difficult days.
Psalm 23.
-Libby Haire
JulieWunder says
Life is hard, but so beautiful. Thanks for reading and praying, Libby.
Wendy@Taking the Long Way Home says
Life is so special...and we need to remember to cherish every day. A perfect example.
JulieWunder says
So true Wendy. Take nothing for granted.
Rick Hill says
Julie:
I was talking today with Sherill and Lynn Barber. Sherill had shared the story of Jay and all the tragedies the family had gone through while we were on a three day hiking trip in the Virginia mountains last fall. He must have incredible faith to be able to deal with all this. We will continue to pray for the family.
Rick Hill
Astronomer
JulieWunder says
Thanks so much Rick.
lacey@fairytalesandfitness says
So Sorry to hear of your friend's loss. I will be saying a prayer tonight for him.
JulieWunder says
Thanks so much Lacey!
Kristy from Southern In Law says
This post is perfect, Julie. What a wonderful perspective your Dad has given you <3
JulieWunder says
Thank you so much! He's a wise man!
Sandra says
Your father's words are just what I needed to hear today. Your friend is in my prayers.
JulieWunder says
I'm so glad Sandra. Glad they helped.
Edye says
My sincerest prayers go out to all those mourning sweet little Malachi's loss. Heaven has gained another angel <3
JulieWunder says
Thanks so much Edye.
Chelle says
Julie, Let us not forget Matthew 19:14...
But Jesus said, "Let the little children come to me and do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of Heaven." (ESV)
Please send my thoughts and prayers to Jay and his family. Those same thoughts and prayers are with you and yours as well.
May God Bless you both in your times of need.
JulieWunder says
So true, Chelle. God Bless you too.
Paula Fox says
❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ Thank You Julie!! This post was NEEDED at this time!!
Have a Blessed day!
JulieWunder says
I'm so glad it helped a little Paula. You too.
Emily says
My heart is so heavy, knowing that the hardest part when a child of God dies, is that we will miss them so much. I pray that we might see little Malachi, Lord willing, in heaven some day, but I know that the grief is still so real for his mommy and daddy. <3 Praying so hard for them and hoping.
JulieWunder says
Thanks Emily. It provides a lot of comfort knowing he's in heaven with both his Moms now.
Madeline Shepherd says
When my father and then my aunt, several years later, committed suicide I thought I just couldn't bear it. But this has touched me so deeply!. Anytime I've met Jay he has been so nice and so polite. I pray for him everyday and my heart aches for him. I hope he knows he ios so greatly loved.
JulieWunder says
How terrible. It's amazing what we can handle when we have to. Thanks so much for your kind words and God bless.
Meagan @ My Life as Mrs says
Such heartbreaking loss. It's amazing how you can feel so much emotion and love for people you've never met. I've dealt with more than my fair share of loss of loved ones and it's always so hard to hear these kinds of stories. Thinking and praying for your friend today.
JulieWunder says
Thanks so much Meagan. I appreciate your prayers so much.
Dan Rathbone says
Thank you for the caring comments , I've watched tv13 for over 50 years , seen many changes there. I've watched Jay struggle with cancer and loose his family , one by one. My heart is heavy for him and his loss , but I admire his courage and hope God will lift him up.
JulieWunder says
Yes. His faith is strong and powerful. It's inspiring.
Deborah @ Confessions of a mother runner says
oh Julie this is so heartbreaking. I am so sorry for you and your friends and family. I've often questioned why things like these happen. Your dad has some good advice. Thinking of you all today
JulieWunder says
Thanks so much Deborah. I appreciate the support.
Christie says
What a special post honoring some very special people. You truly have a gift for words and I really enjoyed the heartfelt feeling behind this post. Thank you for sharing this story.
JulieWunder says
You are too kind. Thank you Christie.
Gail Bell says
As someone who watches WLOS 13 every morning I was deeply saddened by the loss of such a beautiful little boy. Thank you for this kind and sweet tribute.
JulieWunder says
Thanks so much Gail. Hope you are having a good weekend.
Dan Steadman says
can't imagine all Jay is going through...takes me back to August 20, 2003 when we tragically lost my father in law while my wife was 7 months pregnant with our first born...
JulieWunder says
So terrible. Life is so hard sometimes. Thanks so much for reading.
Tina says
What a deeply thoughtful post Julie! Sharing good times is certainly a joy but lifting each other up during painful or challenging times is what connects us as human beings...gifted with Grace, compassion and an endless well of love for one another. I, for one, needed to hear your wisdom today and appreciate the reminder that "this too shall pass." Blessings to you and many thanks!
JulieWunder says
So true Tina. Life is hard, but so beautiful.
Susie @ Suzlyfe says
Sending you and Malachi's family and loved ones love. I think that remembering that the hardships of life will pass helps to make them more fleeting, just as remember that the joys of life will pass helps you to savor them.
JulieWunder says
So true. Thanks so much for the kind words.
Blane Sherer says
Very nice Julie and certainly appropriate.
JulieWunder says
Thanks so much, Blane.
Martha says
so very sorry for Jay's loss, so very kind of you to write this today. I sure like what your Dad has always said, certainly he knows. Thanks for what you wrote and shared today.
JulieWunder says
Thanks for reading Martha. Hope you are having a good weekend.
Mary Beth Jackson says
Nice tribute! A special family! We do become very close to our work family so things like this effect everyone. This to shall pass- nice reminder 🙂
JulieWunder says
Thanks Mary Beth! I'm so glad you enjoyed the piece.